You're sure to do impossible things, if you follow your heart!

/ Thursday, January 26, 2012 /
Today was the second day of new semester classes, and since yesterday didn't go exactly as planned (long story short: I can't get into the class I wanted to get into) I decided to start today off fresh with a nice outfit. It must have helped my spirits, because today's classes were much better. I'm really excited for my classes: one is a Japanese linguistics class and the other is a leadership course. Fun stuff.

I've really taken to wearing a lot of black and white lately, especially now that it's winter. It's become something of my signature style, I guess? But it's such a nice combination! I suppose it could get boring, but I love mixing prints and patterns like I've done here with hearts and bows, so I don't see it getting dull for me any time soon.

I recently rewatched a childhood classic: Thumbelina. It was seriously my favorite movie growing up. One of my favorite songs in the film is the swallow Jacquimo's song, "Follow Your Heart." So when I remembered I had this shirt in my closet I had to pull it out. Of course, the best song in the film is "Let Me Be Your Wings," but I don't have a shirt that says that haha. Don Bluth's movies were all so amazing. I hope the rumors that he's going to make a new film in the near future are true.

I'm experimenting a little tonight with how I take photos. I think my previous pictures suffered a little for too much flash... I know I know, flash bad, but it's a bit hard to get proper lighting in my dorm room. This picture still ended up having more shadows than I wanted, but I think it's an improvement on my past photos! I'm gonna tweak some things and try to get even better in my next set of pictures. I didn't want to worry this one too much, though, or else I'd be taking and editing photos all night. Also how do you like my make-shift coat rack in the back there? That window ledge is seriously the best thing.

I did my make up a little today, so here's a picture of it, including parts of my messy room and my hello kitty covered fridge. She's currently wearing a winter coat since, well, it's winter.

I'm still here... I think.

/ Sunday, January 22, 2012 /
So here I am at almost 3 am, thinking about my blog. This blog. I'm thinking about why my last post is from November 8th, when here it is almost at the end of January.

When I started this blog, what I wanted wasn't just a place I could call my own. I wanted a place where I could connect with people, other bloggers and commenters alike. I wanted a place where I could share my style with other like-minded individuals. I wasn't really interested in being a part of the whole rat-race mentality that plagues a lot of fashion blogs. I mostly just wanted to reach out to people and feel like I was a part of something. That was the whole reasoning behind the title of my blog, because I'm not the only one who dresses the way I do. I wanted to find those people using my blog.

But somewhere along the line I think I lost sight of that. I wracked my brain for things to wear instead of letting it come naturally. I hated how strained and forced my face looked in photos, even after I took multiples--sometimes I even got up to 20 or even 30 before I finally gave up. I didn't like that I couldn't get proper lighting, lighting that wouldn't cast harsh shadows on my face and my knees. I've always had a complex about how my face looks, how my knees look. It's an irrational thought. And even now, when I'm starting to accept myself a little bit more, looking back at these pictures makes me cringe a little even though it's probably more noticeable to me than to anyone else. I also have to say that the abandoning of my blog also occurred at an emotionally difficult time, which didn't make me feel inclined to push through my issues and continue posting. All these things combined led to a week without posting, then a month, then 2 months, and now...

BUT--and here's the but--I don't want to abandon this blog. It brought so many positives for me. It helped me to meet so many people that I loved chatting with, who I want to continue to talk to and get to know more deeply. It helped me develop my style, and I know I've grown even more since then and I'm anxious to show it off here. So, I'm going to give this another try. I'm heading back to school for my next semester tomorrow, and I am really going to try and get this blog rolling again. I'm not sure if anyone is reading this anymore but if you are, I hope you'll stick with me while I give it another go. In closing, here's a recent photo of me (if December can be considered recent):

And here's an even older photo of me. I'm including it because, even though it's a little wannabe model-esque, I feel that I look pretty in it. And that's something I'm striving to do every day.



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